On this the eve of my 58th Birthday I have been contemplating one thing – How do I measure my own worth?
Or is it impossible because in the past I was too embarrassed to look directly at my own reflection? Instead my eyes found the blemish near the right cheek, or I looked only at my hair and saw how it was out of place. I could not see the man I had become, I differed to the opinions of others and hoped to meet a standard that is worthy.
I have heard it said when you have defeated all the demons inside of you, then all the enemies outside of you are no longer a threat. I know this, but at times I am still scared. But perhaps after this past few years of soul searching, I am less fearful.
Through these pictures I notice one thing, in the first when I was 15 I was starting my life and I had a smile and a look of wonderment and possibilities.
That’s what I want on my 58th birthday, is to have possibilities again. Not to feel constrained by external forces that mean to defeat me, but to be empowered by the voices within me that cry out “I CAN”.
I will look into the mirror tomorrow, and not see just the blemishes that mark my face, I will look deeper and see the scars that mark moments in my life. In each of the scars lies a story of endurance and commitment. I will realize that bravery is not the absence of fear, but the recognition of it, and then the ability to face it head on.
When I wake I think I will decide that I have more self-worth than yesterday, and understand even though tomorrow hasn’t been written yet, I shall still aim for more worth than today.
Namaste my friends
