Tonight I go off on an adventure that I may not return – yes I have started Yoga.
I began to see how serious this might be as I entered the Lulu Lemon store to buy a mat. There it lay before me – 4 feet of thin rubber for $80 – this must be magical rubber.
The nice young girl at the counter eyed me up and down and suggested “Oh taking Yoga classes are you?” as I carried the mat and a $25 nylon strap to the counter.
“What made you guess” I replied.
“Well you look like someone who does Yoga” she added, to which I said “Yes I can see that, I am close to 60 – my butt is touching the back of my knees, I am carrying 15 kilos too much but I have that look”.
She giggles the way attractive young woman can, and then said “oh no way you are 60, you look waaay younger”.
To which I replied “Oh no waaay you aren’t lying, but I appreciate the offer.” I don’t think she got it.
She proceeded to show me skin tight Yoga pants for men that left no region unknown, I tried to explain that there are currently court orders in affect for all men over 55 who even think about wearing such attire. She giggled more and said this purple pair would look great on me, the price tag $160.00 – I wondered how much Vodka and Donuts I could buy for that.
I declined nicely and left – I thought about hailing a taxi to take me the 2 blocks to where I parked (it was an uphill walk after all) but thought maybe the long slow climb back to my vehicle would do me good.
On the way another fitness shop beckoned – so I went in to see maybe if there was more appropriate fitness wear for a man of my vintage – another 20 something shop assistant pulled a sleeveless t-shirt off the rack suggesting I NEEDED THIS – it contained enough light material to work as a loin cloth, for a pygmy front only coverage. But at $60 it seemed a bargain so I bought it – plus she made no lies about my age when I mentioned I am trying to get my youth back, she grunted and went back to chewing gum and texting while she sold – there is a value to honesty.
The Yoga studio is 4 blocks, now a new dilemma – walk or taxi?
I am having problems bending over the tie my sneakers, and my circa 1978 converse workout attire is not to Marina’s liking, she has threatened to not walk with me or be close at class. I wonder why High Tops aren’t good for Yoga?
There is one joy, there are 2 bars and 3 cafes close by on the way home, in case I am in trouble.
Wish me luck – if I am not back in 2 days remember me kindly…